


Smother

by astr0cat



Category: British Actor RPF, Loki: Agent of Asgard, Loki: Thor the Dark World, Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: Gore, Lotta gore, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2016-05-12
Packaged: 2018-06-07 21:38:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6825373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astr0cat/pseuds/astr0cat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Song is Smother by Daughter: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=JDZaiM8oAOU</p>
    </blockquote>





	Smother

**Author's Note:**

> Song is Smother by Daughter: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=JDZaiM8oAOU

_I’m wasted, losing time_

Thomas stood where he was, staring out the window of his home with a glass slipped loosely between his fingers. It was a surprise that he had not dropped the object yet. There was a dull, lifeless look hovering his glistening eyes. Though wet tears dampened his cheeks, he still set his lips in a firm line, why he hadn't screamed out yet he did not know.

_I’m a foolish, fragile spine_

There was nothing left of him, his spirit washed away along with his once jovial heart. His spirit had turned to marble and his heart to ice, cold solid, unbeating, unmoving.

_I want all that is not mine_

The brunette took a sip from the cup of wine he held with loose fingers, the fragile item surprisingly still in his hand. Multiple times he had thought he had dropped it, sent it plummeting to the ground but yet it still sat perched in his palm. How he wished he could have it all, but he did. But he wanted one thing above it all, would trade everything for such a foreign feeling.

_I want him but we’re not right_

The God of Mischief, he wanted him, desired and _needed_ him. As if on que, the half full glass finally slipped from his grasp...just like Loki had. Falling for another, her name was...actually Tom didn’t know her bloody name and he didn’t care.

Wine splashed across the wooden floor, staining the chestnut brown a dark burgundy.

_In the darkness I will meet my creators_

The actor stood upright, wanting to go get something to clean the excessive amounts of glass. As his legs brought him up, a swirling black clouded his gaze, his eyes rolling back and he staggered. His hand darted behind him to grab ahold of the chair but missed, the lack of something to hold caused him to fall to the ground with a thunk. 

Bits of glass became embedded within his cheek, small but yet painful.

_And they will all agree, that I’m a suffocator_

In the darkness he sat floating, pain coursing through his head. His face aflame along with his neck, what had happened? Had he gotten burned?

An image of the known god appeared before him, coming to life within seconds and with fear racing through his veins, Tom reached out. The ravenette before him squinted out a glare before turning on his heel and marching off into the darkness.

_I should go now quietly_

The Brit’s hand slipped down onto the dark, invisible floor. Upon contact, the surface fell and Thomas began slipping into the black, tears flying from his face as he fell. His gut screamed and churned as he fell and fell and _fell_.

_For my bones have found a place to lie down and sleep_

Suddenly he hit the ground, the impact causing his heart to seemingly explode. Shaking, he lifted his head up with a painful tug, eyes widening at seeing his innards lying around him in a bloody mess, the scarlet tracking where the ground was in all this darkness. The bones in his left leg splayed out in all directions, poking through his tender flesh.

Eyes twitching in disbelief, he reached forward and cupped one of the stringy intestines, wincing at being able to feel the touch. Suddenly eyes were on him, hundreds if not thousands and Tom squirmed. “Don’t..” he tugged on the organ and desperately tried to shove it back in, the pink spongy muscle sloshing back out his body with a squelch. “Don’t look at me...don’t look...don’t look at my insides.” His voice was broken, sobs wracking through his form causing him to tremble and quiver.

_Where all my layers can become reeds_

The eyes continued to stare, unblinking despite all his desperate pleads. Thomas flinched when his leg was tugged on, violently at that. When he went to look down at what was causing the new pain, he was met with an unknown horrified feeling. Arms, arms and hands arose from the darkness-no they were the darkness. Unseen except for the small light Tom gave off, the shimmer bouncing off of their surface. The brunette attempted to kick at them with his good appendage, his teeth grit and brows furrowed up. With every attempt a mix between a groan and a gasp left him.

_All my limbs can become trees_

Slender fingers gripped his broken foot, and pulled, tugged mercilessly until the Brit could feel his tendons scream. Though Tom already knew the entity was too strong, much too strong, he still kicked and hit at it until the rest of his limbs were grabbed ahold of. Only his right hand remained free, unblemished. His left limb creaked under the pressure and he sobbed, cried loudly as the muscles tore, flesh ripping free. Screaming, the brunette smashed his eyes shut, begging for it to be over only to be met with a now missing arm. His last remaining leg was tugged until the muscles tore, but Thomas collapsed onto the ground and the arms released him. 

With a tender touch, the actor weakly reached over to his bloodied socket of an arm. Blood trickled onto his fingertips and he could only sob weakly in response.

_All my children can become me_

The fingers grabbed at his body once again, gentler now. Softly, they pulled him down into the floor, the blanket of black shrouding his form quickly.

_What a mess I leave_

The slender digits twirled his locks of hair as he was pulled into the black, his pain only increasing once submerged. It was like he was drowning, drowning but he could still breathe. What was this feeling, why, why was he still able to breathe? Eyes closing, he let out a puff of air, allowing the feeling to continue as his consciousness was swept away.

_To follow_

Before he could fully lose himself, a figure appeared, a pale hand reaching down into the floor above. It grabbed at him, pulling him harshly until his head surfaced from the swarm of arms with a ‘pop’.

_To follow_

Thomas couldn't open his eyes, his body falling motionless on the savior. The ‘hero’ dropped him suddenly and the brunette felt the floor collide painfully with his temple. Maybe it wasn't a savior.

_To follow_

His organs still squished and slid about, sloshing out of his wounds, his missing limbs leaving a great loss.

_To follow_

He was vaguely aware that he was falling again and when he opened his eyes he saw his heart literally jump out of his chest. The still beating muscle disappearing into the inevitable darkness. Tom hit the floor, eyes flying open upon the contact. Sitting up and gulping in copious gasps of air.

_In the darkness I will meet my creators_

Tears streamed down as his face as he took in his surroundings, it was his home but it was dark. Just as dark as the dream, the sun having set hours ago. Sobbing down, Tom curled his lithe form into a ball, weakly tugging the shards out of his bruised skin. Though he was relieved it had just been a nightmare, one hell of a nightmare at that, he couldn't cover up the fact that he desired to hold someone. He required the mental reassurance that he was fine, that he was safe, that he was loved.

_They will all agree, I’m a suffocator_

But he couldn’t have that, he just couldn’t. Loki was gone and he was alone, though his fans would beg to differ he was most certainly indeed alone.

_Suffocator_

Maybe he had strangled the love out of the ravenette, maybe he hadn’t been quick enough, always too slow to pick up the signs. He had lost his chance, the god was no longer even in his realm.

_Suffocator_

It seemed like the very air Thomas inhaled was stolen from him, greedily taken by some sort of theft. No matter how hard he tried to collect himself, it was all in vain. He wanted something to stop him from spewing the blubbering, terrified nonsense he was currently babbling. He required someone to hold him which was Loki came into the picture...but he was gone. Everytime he reminded himself of that fact, he continued to cry louder and louder.

_Suffocator_

But no one came...no one heard and no one cared. The god didn’t arrive like his prince in shining armor; king more like it. He didn’t come to comfort the brunette, didn’t appear at all or in any form; yet Tom still felt a gaze burning his back.

_Oh no_

Softly he apologized to the brother of Thor, whispering soft and kind words as if it would solve this rubik's cube. But it didn’t, it _never_ would.

_I’m sorry if I smothered you_

His hand slipped in the red liquid and sent his fingers in the broken glass, adding on to the amount of scarlet that continued to stain the wooden floor.

_I’m sorry if I smothered you_

The Brit wasn’t sure if he had been heard, he knew he had been made known to at least Heimdall, were those the eyes on him? Whatever...even if Loki did somehow manage to get around to hearing his apology it’s not like he would ever accept it. Thomas was nothing to him but a foolish Midgardian, and _insect_.

_I sometimes wish I’d stayed inside my mother_

After all, a tear slipped down his cheek and he wiped it away with haste, they didn’t even carry the bond of friendship with them anymore. Loki had decided to quit cold turkey and leave, never to return but somehow...Tom still knew he was there, watching him.

There would be pain for both the mortal and the god, Tom guessed he had acquired more though. 

_Never to come out_

And suddenly, the urge to stay silent and blend within the shadows hit him hard. He wished nothing more than to fade, to be non-existent, _to never have been born._


End file.
